A Letter to my Cherished One

I haven’t stopped thinking about you and I don’t believe I ever will.

You hold a piece of my heart that will never be taken or replaced.

I feel so guilty these days for being so excited about our next one on the way. I feel like I don’t deserve to be happy and that I haven’t mourned you enough yet. My heart still grieves at the loss of you, my child, our child. I still feel that I didn’t do enough to look after you. That I didn’t protect you enough like a good mum should. I feel that I let you down in a big way.

You never let me down though. You taught me so much about myself, my life, and my family. You brought me closer to God. You helped heal our relationship. You taught me how to love my husband better, you taught me compassion, mercy, and empathy, lessons that I will never forget. I will take you with me throughout my life.

I promise that one day I will give you the hug from a mum that you never got to experience. I will kiss your soft cheek for the first time and nurse you and spend eternity with you. Your dad will carry you around on his shoulders and spoil you with his sloppy kisses and big bear hugs. We will all be together as a family in the presence of our Saviour.

I promise to never forget. I will love you always, my cherished one.

Nearly Banned by the Dog Groomers

I received a message on my phone yesterday afternoon saying that the cost for Jet's grooming would be double what we thought. A) because of the condition of his coat, B) because of his behaviour!!

I was so embarrassed! I knew he wouldn't really be a helpful dog, but I didn't expect them to have to muzzle him and spend an entire day trimming him! He was fine with the clippers....until they turned on! Then he became a nasty piece of work! They had to shave him in stages.

But now look at him! He is like a different dog! He got a shave, nails clipped, ears cleaned out, shampoo & condition and a flea treatment! The lady who did it all said we are lucky we came to her as no other dog groomer would have done it with they way he behaved! I think we need to do a little work on our little man. He is going to have to learn who's boss around here, because it is no longer him!

He sulked all night last night. I don't blame him. I couldn't stop laughing at him! He looks like a totally different dog and he looks hilarious! All he has left is a moustache and tail. Cutey.

He was a bit chirpier this morning, so hopefully he is over his little sulk and will learn to love his new 'do'.

hehehehe....hopefully they haven't banned us for life at the dog groomers and let us back in a few months!

Why I didn't make the Olympics

I'm sure we've all been there done that with some of this stuff!! Except for maybe the last one!

Tid Bits

Jet is off to the dog groomers today! His hair is so long and mattered it's not funny. I hate patting him because it's just big balls of matted hair! Poor thing, it is just so bad that it is irritating his skin and he is constantly trying to pull his hair out.

Hopefully tomorrow we will be able to see his beautiful face and give him lots of kisses and pats! I just hope he doesn't get banned from the dog groomers for life! He really doesn't like people trying to cut his hair...though we're trying to help him!

At our wedding we had 3 massive posters hanging at the reception. We got 2 of them block-mounted and they arrived yesterday! We still need to get the 3rd one block-mounted, but thought I would show you these 2. I love them!! My favourite is the one of Russell hammering it out on the drum kit and with me blocking my ears. Love it I tells ya! We just need to find the perfect spot to hang them now!

I made Russell stand next to the posters so that you could see just how big they are! He wasn't very impressed (as you can tell by his face!)

Pics from Busy Bee

I've realised that some photos are missing, but the ones I have below show a bit of what we got done during our busy bee day a couple of weekends ago.

We are so blessed to have a family who are so willing to give up one of their weekends to help us out!

Jos with one of his many tools chopping some wood for our new patio!

Jos starting on the new patio after ripping out the old one!

We also got him to remove the 'wagon wheel' that was attached to the front of the house! I'm glad it's gone....drove me mad everytime I saw it because it was hung so off centre!

Jos whizzing away!

The patio has disappeared!

One of the holes from a tree that was removed. 6 trees all up were removed! Pesky trees

Some of the gardening crew. They did a massive and amazing job!

Asher attacking the lawn that hadn't been mowed in over 6 mths.

Me in deep concentration...steady, steady....

"I don't need no stinking tape to keep a straight line!"

Me and baby did the cutting in on almost every single wall in the house.

Hallway before shot. The blue on the bottom half was in all the rooms, bathroom & laundry. It is now a lovely 'Manhattan Beige"

Hallway after shot....sigh I'm in love!

The wall which you see when you first walk into our house. This was the first coat and mum was just getting ready to apply the 2nd.

Feature wall after! I love love love it. It is our 'wedding wall'. It will slowly accumalate a wedding photo from every family member. It only has us, and Robbo & Kayls for now, but we will be getting parents and all sibling wedding shots up eventually

The 'drum room' - for some reason I don't have an after shot of this room!

Our bedroom getting the 1st coat of it's feature wall.

Remember, this room was ALL blue

Our bedroom after....ahhhhhh

With a flash on to see the colours better

It really feels like 'our' room now

Baby room. This was ALL blue too. It's now the beige and has a feature wall of 'Limesicle'

Mum & Dru preparing the bright green to be applied

This is the same as the drum room. The drum room has beige and a feature of the green.

I LOVE it!!!

This is our kitchen/dining room. This is where the hideous 'Rainforest' wallpaper was. After the wallpaper was removed we were left with strips of green and yellow!

It is now all ONE colour....beige.

Looks so much better in my opinion!

Boy or Girl?

Can you believe that our baby is due in no less than 14 weeks!!??!

I googled some old wives tales for a little fun on guessing the sex of our baby. We chose not to find out the sex during our ultrasounds and are both starting to go crazy trying to pick which sex we think it will be! Not that it matters mind you, we just like talking about it and trying to guess.

Russ has always said it's a boy. His reasoning is that he can't see me with a girl. And that when he saw the baby at the ultrasound, he thought it looked like a boy by it's movements etc.

I have been pretty undecided. Earlier on in the pregnancy I thought it was a girl and couldn't imagine it being a boy. But now, I'm leaning towards it being a boy! And Russell has now changed his mind to a girl! We just can't make up our minds!

Here are a few old wives tales that I found. My answers are in bold. Just thought we would have a little fun here :)

1) Carrying High or Low?
This is a well known old wives tale – so many people will want to look at your belly and think they can guess just from looking! So as the tale goes, if you are carrying low, it’s a boy, or if you’re carrying high it’s a girl. We won’t tell them that the way the baby is carried is actually a reflection of your own body shape, muscle, baby’s position and other physical factors!

I don't really know. I feel like I'm just round and all in the middle!
My guesstimate: boy

2) Dry or Soft?
If your skin is dry, you’re said to be having a boy – and if it’s soft, then a girl is on the way.

I don't know on this one either. My skin is usually dry and it hasn't really changed!
My guesstimate: boy

3) What’s Baby’s Heartrate?
First, to set the record straight, until it’s born, your baby’s heartrate will not be affected by it’s gender. But so they say, if you’re carrying a girl, then baby’s heartrate will be above 140bpm (beats per minute). A boy is said to have a heart rate under 140bpm. A study published in the Journal of Reproductive Medicine (1996) has dismissed this theory, as has other research. Your baby’s heart rate will change often during a pregnancy, depending on the baby’s age and it’s movement. Anything from 120-160bpm is normal for an unborn baby.

At our 12 wk ultrasound the heartrate was in the 150's - the second ultrasound and every time they have listened to the heart since, it has been 140 and under.
Guesstimate: boy

4) Your Flowing Locks
Has your hair become thinner and dull? Or full-bodied and glossy? Thin and dull says girl, gorgeous and glossy says a boy.

I don't really know on this one either!! Sorry!!
Guesstimate: boy/girl :p

5) Where Are You Carrying Extra Weight?
Even those extra pregnancy kilos is said to give us an insight into your baby’s gender! If you are carrying extra weight at the front, then you’re having a boy… but if you are carrying extra weight on your bum and hips, then you have been carrying a girl.

I'm not carrying extra weight. Though, I personally feel that my bum and thighs are bigger!!
Guesstimate: girl

6) Maths
If you combine your age at the time of conception with the number of the month you conceived and the resulting number is odd – then it’s a girl on the way. If the resulting number is even, then it’s a boy for you.

I scored 25 - so looks like it's a girl for this one!

7) Sweet, Salty or Sour?
Another well known old wives tale!!! Are you craving sweet foods like juice, fruits and chocolate? If so, old wives say that you could be having a girl. But if you’re craving sour or salty foods, then you could be having a boy. It’s also said that if you are having a boy, you will crave protein like meat and dairy. I have trouble believing this one because I think we’d be overrun by a population of females – we all love chocolate pregnant or not!

Have mainly been craving lemons. However I still love my fruit...have gone off lollies a bit and have never been a big fan of chocolate. I also love baby-bell cheeses at the moment. Seeing as it's one of the only 'gourmet' cheeses I can eat at the moment!
Guesstimate: boy

8) The Wedding Ring Over The Belly Trick!
Get your wedding ring (or other ring/needle/pin) and attach it with a strand of your hair or some string. Lie down and dangle the ring over your belly. If it starts moving in circles, you are having a boy, or if it moves like a pendulum from side to side, then you are having a girl.

I've done this twice with the girls at work. It spun in circles both times.
Guesstimate: boy

9) Morning Sickness?
Did you experience morning sickness in early pregnancy? If you did, then you’re said to be carrying a girl, but if you didn’t have morning sickness, then it’s a boy.

I had morning sickness. Not as extreme as some people...but I definately felt queesy for most of the first 16 weeks!
Guesstimate: girl

10) Cold Feet?
If your feet get colder than they used to pre-pregnancy, it’s a sign you have a boy on the way. If your feet are the same, then it’s a girl!

My feet are always cold! They have stayed the same
Guesstimate: girl

11) How Do You Look?
Do you look better than ever while pregnant? Or has the pregnancy done your looks no favors? As it goes, if you look great during pregnancy, then you are carrying a boy. If you don’t look too flash, you’re having a girl, because she’s stolen all your good looks!

I have had sooooooo many comments that I look fantastic...nice to hear :)
Guesstimate: boy

12) How’s Your Partner’s Belly?
Apparently, if your husband puts on ‘sympathy’ weight with you during your pregnancy, then you’re supposed to be carrying a girl. If he doesn’t put on any weight, then it’s a boy.

He has stayed the same....while I have just gotten bigger & bigger!
Guesstimate: boy

13) Pimples, Schmiples…
If you get acne during pregnancy, apparently you’re having a girl, and if you don’t, then you’re carrying a boy.

They have cleared up since falling preggers
Guesstimate: boy

14) Are You A Lefty or a Righty?
So when you sleep, do you sleep on your left? Because if you do, then it’s a boy for you! On your right, a girl is in sight.

I sleep on both sides! I switch between the 2 all night!
Guesstimate: boy/girl :p

15) Checking Out Your Wee!
Ooooookay…. now apparently if you have bright yellow urine, then you’re carrying a boy, but if it’s dull / clear, then you’re carrying a girl. On a serious note though, if you have dark urine, up your fluids intake as you may be dehydrated.

Mine is bright yellow like when I used to take my iron tablets! Sorry for the info!
Guesstimate: boy

16) What Does Your Belly Look Like?
A basketball or a watermelon? Because if it looks more like a basketball, then old wives say boy, but if it more resembles a watermelon then it’s a girl.

I would say it's a basketball - it most certainly feels like one!
Guesstimate: boy

17) Hairy Legs?
Has the hair on your legs grown faster than normal? Or has it grown just like normal? Because if it’s growing faster than it did pre-pregnancy, then you’re said to be having a boy.

I would say it's normal....I don't really keep track on hair growth! I just shave it when it needs it!
Guesstimate: girl

So, If I add correctly, we have 10x boy answers and 5x girl answers and 2x eithers!

I still am inclined to say girl though!! oh, I just don't know...sigh...my brain is starting to hurt!

I am going to start up a competition in a couple of weeks time where you can all have your own guess at the sex, weight, and arrival date of the baby!

I never thought this possible

What have I done to make you hate me so much?
I wish I could fix the way things are, but I can’t do it when your not willing to even talk to me!
Am I such a despicable, disgusting, low-life that you can’t even front up to me? I don’t know what I have done wrong and it hurts to my very core to know that you are hurting so much that you are reacting in such a strong and hurtful way.
Please just talk to me. Is what we had not worth fighting for? Or am I the gullible fool who thought you truly did love me? I guess I am…

Creating True Intimacy

By Rob Furlong
Challenge Newspaper Aug 2008

Mention the word intimacy and you will likely receive a number of definitions. For some it means the feeling of closeness that is built through two people sharing together; for others, it is the sensation of physical touch. The Oxford Dictionary defines intimacy as being “close in acquaintance, familiar, friendship, close connexion, knowledge resulting from familiarity.” I like that last explanation: intimacy is “knowledge resulting from familiarity.” Put another way, intimacy is knowledge gained about someone because you are close to them.

It seems to me that our world tends to focus primarily on the idea that intimacy is about being sexual with each other and the more I read and listen, the more convinced I am that this area of our lives is treated with great casualness by people. Perhaps an example from the writer, Naomi Wolf, will explain what I mean:

“I am noting that the power and charge of sex are maintained when there is some sacredness to it… I will never forget a visit I made to Ilana, an old friend… when I saw her again… I could not get over it. Ilana has waist length, wild and curly golden-blonde hair. ‘Can’t I even see your hair?’ I asked, trying to find my old friend in there. ‘No,’ she demurred quietly. ‘Only my husband,’ she said with a calm sexual confidence, ‘ever gets to see my hair.’ …She must feel, I thought, so hot.”

Wolf’s point is well made and illustrates that intimacy is much more than just a physical experience — there are certain things that only a husband and wife share with each other — they are not for the rest of the world to see.

How does this relate to your marriage? If a marriage is to survive through a lifetime then true intimacy must be at the heart of it and both husband and wife must be committed to developing this in their relationship.

It is fair enough to say that this is easier said than done and yes, we do struggle with trying to understand each other at times, but there are some simple principles that can be observed that will lead to deeper intimacy between a couple.

Develop a listening heart. Just the simple practice of giving your husband or wife your undivided attention while they speak will greatly enhance intimacy in your relationship. And try to really listen — stop assuming that you think you know what they are saying and try to hear the other person’s heart.

Ask questions in order to clarify. If you are not sure what the other person said, then ask them to explain a little more! No one ever loses out by asking questions!

Pray together. Share your personal needs with each, your fears and concerns and then bring them to your Heavenly Father together.

These principles are simple but if you commit to getting them off the printed page and into your life you will be on the road to building genuine intimacy into your marriage.

Far too many people approach their relationships — especially the marriage relationship — like the Olympic 100 metres race. They see them as a sprint and so important things like communication and sharing are neglected. Sadly they wonder often too late, why the relationship failed. If you want your marriage to succeed, then think in terms of a long distance race.

When you watch Kenyans run the long distance events at the Olympics you will notice that they usually run together, each runner spurring the other on until the finish line is in view. So it is with marriage; as husband and wife you run together through a lifetime of building intimacy and genuine relationship and your relationship goes the distance. I think that is why Solomon once said,
“Two are better than one… if one falls, (the other) can help him up” (Ecclesiastes chapter 4, verse 9).

I can't wait for Summer to come!!

Diary of a Perth Summer ....its written by an Englishman...

August 31st:
Just got transferred with work into our new home in Perth!! Now this is a city that knows how to live!! Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy evenings. What a place! I watched the sunset from a deck chair on the verandah. It was beautiful. I've finally found my home. I love it here.

September 13th:
Really heating up. Got to 35 today. Not a problem. Live in an air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun everyday like this. I'm turning into a sun worshiper.

September 30th:
Had the backyard landscaped with tropical plants today. Lots of palms and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing lawn for me. Another scorcher today, but I love it here.

October 10th:
The temperature hasn't been below 30 all week. How do people get used to this kind of heat? At least today it's kind of windy though. But getting used to the heat is taking longer that I expected.

October 15th:
Fell asleep by the pool. Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my body. Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this.

October 20th:
I missed Kitty (our cat) sneaking into the car when I left this morning. By the time I got to the hot car for lunch, Kitty had died and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and stank up the $3,000 leather upholstery. I told the kids that she ran away. The car now smells like Wiskettes and cat shit. I learned my lesson though. No more pets in this heat.

October 25th:
The wind sucks. It feels like a giant bloody blow dryer!! And it's hot as hell. The home air-conditioner is on the blink and the AC repairman charged $200 just to drive over and tell me he needed to order parts.

October 30th:
Been sleeping outside by the pool for 3 nights now. Bloody $450,000 house and we can't even go inside. Why did I ever come here?

November 4th:
It's 35 degrees. Finally got the ol' air-conditioner fixed today. It cost $500 and gets the temperature down to 25, but this bloody humidity makes the house feel like it's about 30. Stupid repairman. I hate this stupid place.

November 8th:
If another wise arse cracks, "Hot enough for you today?" I'm going to strangle him. Bloody heat. By the time I get to work the car's radiator was boiling over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like baked cat!!

November 9th:
Tried to run some messages after work. Wore shorts, and sat on the black leather seats in the ol' car. I thought my arse was on fire. I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my legs and my arse. Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried arse, and baked cat.

November 10th:
The weather report might as well be a bloody recording. Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to do anything for 2 damn months and the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain in this damn place? Water rationing will be next, so my $2,000 worth of palms just might dry up and blow into the bloody pool. Even the palms can't live in this heat.

November 14th:
Welcome to HELL!!! Temperature got to 38 today. Now the air-conditioner's gone in my car. The repairman came to fix it and said, "Hot enough for you today?" My wife had to spend the $2,500 house payment to bail my arse out of jail for assaulting the repairman. Bloody Perth.
What kind of a sick demented idiot would want to live here?

December 1st:
WHAT????? This is the first day of Summer???? You are kidding me!!!

blech #2

*cough*
*sputter*
*sniff*
*drip*
*sneeze*

Rinse. Repeat

Since last Saturday (26/07) I have been sick as a dog. It started out as just a chest infection with swollen glands, but it has now swung into a full on cold/flu. I am feeling puffy, red, and sore!
Hence, I haven’t really been up to posting anything.

What’s going on in the Ingram household you ask?

Here is an update in bullet mode:

We have painted our entire house!! YAY – and we have ripped out trees in the front and back yards. We are also hopefully planting our big olive trees and the first stage of our veggie patch in the next couple of weeks

Russell is on crutches – he has torn cartlidge in his knee and also has a cold

My sister-in-law is having her baby shower next week! Yikes! It has come up so fast…I now have to come up with a present idea!

My soon-to-be-nephew is predicted to be 2 wks bigger than originally thought, so we may have a little one sooner than we thought! Either that or he has a huge head like his father.

Bub-o-luv is awake most hours of the day – and night! And is constantly moving and kicking, and head butting it seems! I am loving it! I love sitting for hours feeling the movements…and so does Russell! He is in love! :)

I haven't got one stretch mark BUT I got my first maternity bra last week. 10DD/E....10 frickin DD/E!!! Good grief!

We are going to be setting up the ‘nursery’ in the next couple of weeks…I’m so excited I can’t wait!

I am more in love with Russell than I ever have been before

My parents are off to Zimbabwe in 2 weeks – lots of prayer is required here!

My sis and bro-in-law are off to Bali when mum & dad get back from Zim.

We put our lemon car in to get brakes done and ended up spending $700 more on other ‘stuff’ – oh, and the brakes never got done! Apparently they are FINE!

Jet is still a dero

I am going to be doing ‘On Earth’ with our church. We are going to be doing it in Kwinana and I am really excited. Missions is one of the things that is always on my heart, and I am really looking forward to participating in the….thingy…..seminar? I don’t know what you would call it. We won’t be going overseas, but will be implementing the course in the community of Kwinana.

My little brother Dru is growing in his faith in leaps and bounds! He never ends to surprise and inspire me. He even opens car doors for me! And sometimes tells me that I “look very nice today”. Awwww so sweet! He even got to feel the baby kick on Sat. night. He was very enthused.

We got to catch up with our great mates Shane & Kim during the week. They were in Perth for 6 days! They have been serving in Thailand for the past couple of years and are moving to Norway to complete studies. We are missing them already and we were blessed to be able to spend a few precious hours with them. I wish they were going to be around to be in our children’s lives…they are such amazing and awesome people!

I’m sure there is a lot more that has been going on, but I am too lazy to think about anything else!

Hopefully Russ and I will be feeling better this week….please pray for healing and recovery to come quickly!