Ava's Birth story

The story of Ava joining us in this world (began much the same way as Eme's if you know what I mean) but is also quite different to Emery's Story.

My due date was August 24th. I found out Christmas Day of 2009. I knew I was pregnant but I wanted to wait till Christmas to do the 'official test' and to tell Russell. While there was the initial excitement that we were going to be having a second child, I was a little upset about the timing as I was about to start my Uni degree in Nursing. The plan there is to eventually become a Midwife funnily enough!

So, the pregnancy didn't really start off on a good foot. I was being selfish I knew. I wanted the best of both worlds. I also didn't want to look like the fruit loop at Uni...huge pregnant belly dragging around books people whispering under their breaths 'teen pregnancy!!' (I look like I’m only about 15 these days!!) But I was determined to get through it (mainly because people said I shouldn't - note to all, if you don't want me to do something don't tell me...I'll try prove you wrong).

So along with a couple of other things this didn't set the pregnancy up to be easy. I was stressed at Uni because of the heavy books, having to park a half hour walk away from classes, getting lost, being stressed at home as Eme would cry every time I went anywhere near close to a computer/book to study, stressed because 'baby brain' was in full swing, while still trying to maintain relationships with those who are close in my life. I wanted to be superwoman. I wanted to be able to do it all and cope as though it was all just a walk in the park. The first time I went to see a Doctor at the hospital for the pregnancy was when I was 30 weeks into the pregnancy and had just sat my final exam at Uni. The midwife was NOT impressed that this was the first I had come to see a Doctor about the pregnancy.

Around 34 weeks into the pregnancy the doctor I was seeing said he was not happy with the baby's size and with the size of my belly. He said I was a few weeks behind what I should be, so a few tests were organised. I went in for a couple of CTG's and had an ultrasound a couple of weeks later. The sonographer said that everything looked fine. So off I headed home. Only to be called an hour later by the sonographer saying that he wasn't happy about the umbilical cord. He said that there was an artery missing and that the baby wasn't getting enough of a blood supply, he had booked an appointment with an Obstetrician for the next morning which I had to attend. What followed in the next couple of weeks was countless appointments being hooked up to CTG machines and ultrasounds. On the 19th of August I had a phone call from my OB saying that she wanted me to come in the next morning for another CTG - she just wasn't happy with the results of all the previous ones. So the next morning was a stressful one. The 20th was my Dad's 50th birthday. My mum had been planning a huge party for him for that night. She had asked my siblings and I to prepare speech's and I needed to pick up some cheeses to bring to the party. My friend had joked earlier that she thought this bub would be born on the 20th just in time for an announcement at my Dad's party (she wasn't far off!!) Anyway, that morning I threw on a jumper (no under top or bra) and some trackies (most comfy thing that far in the pregnancy) and took Russ to work. On the way home I was going to run into the 'Spud Shed' and grab the cheese for the party. In the parking lot of the shop I bumped into a very old friend who I hadn't seen for around 5 years...great timing I thought! Some crazy big woman running around without a bra on!! I was SO embarrassed. I quickly grabbed my cheeses and left! When I got home around 8.30am I received yet another phone call from a midwife saying that I needed to come in ASAP to be induced. She explained that the OB had spent the night tossing and turning and was just not comfortable leaving the baby in any longer. She would be a lot happier if the baby was just born and checked over (not that they can put it back if it's not ready!!)

I'll just make a note here that we hadn't found out the sex of the baby. We didn't find out when we were pregnant with Emery, and we didn't this time round either...that is until the last ultrasound I had at around 38.5 weeks. I was starting to feel a bit depressed about everything and I needed a little 'pick me up'. I asked the sonographer if he could tell me the sex...after he told me I cried for 2 days. But that's another story!!

So, after finding out I needed to go in and be induced I burst into tears. I just wasn't ready for it. I called Russell and cried and he sorted out getting home and leaving work 'stuff' with other people. I called my mum whose first response was "did you tell them it's your fathers birthday and you have his party tonight?" which made me even more upset and I just kept crying. Feeling bad that I would probably miss Dad's special day, and they would be stuck watching Eme when they had so much to plan already. I was mainly upset though because I wasn't ready for my time with just Eme to be over. She had no idea what was about to happen, I didn't want to lose the special bond I had with her.

Most of the pregnancy I felt that this baby was going to intrude on my relationship with Eme, and I resented it a bit. I was quickly trying to say goodbye to her and she didn't understand why I was so upset. I dropped her at mum and dad's place where I realised that mum was just in shock as was I and so didn't react in the best way. Her, Dad, and my Grandma prayed for us before we headed off to the hospital which was comforting.

After getting to the hospital and lead into the delivery room, I was just so anxious. This was nothing like Eme's birth. I wasn't mentally prepared for this. My body hadn't gone into its own labour, I was being interrupted with medicine and I just hadn't had the time to mentally prepare for the birth. When you first go into labour you have time...which I think God created that way so that you can mentally prepare for what is about to come!

They checked my cervix and decided that because it wasn't ready they would need to apply a hormone gel. After being there a few hours it wasn't until 1pm that the gel got applied. But my goodness, as soon as it was applied I could feel my back start to ache and slight contractions start. By 2.30pm I was having full blown contractions 1 minute long and a minute apart. In my mind I thought, great I'm nearly done! This baby will be here any minute. My midwife came along and hooked me up to the CTG machine which I had to stay attached to so they could monitor the baby and make sure she didn't get stressed. I also had to be attached to a drip again as I did with Eme due to Strep B. My midwife checked to see how my body was going and proceeded to inform me that my body wasn't in labour. Uh....excuse me?? What do you mean I'm not in labour?? She then said that the gel just gives you the pain of labour in the hopes that your body will go into labour on its own...so start dilating etc. She said I was just having pain from the gel and that my cervix had not dilated AT ALL!! This was NOT what I wanted to be hearing! This was around 4pm. She went and got me some sandwiches and some drinks, but I was not interested in food at all.

Russell had bought some magazines earlier in the day, and since I wasn't really in the mood for a 'chat' so he sat in a chair next to the bed and had a read.

Before I was induced I had told the midwife that I wanted an epidural - I just wasn't mentally prepared for the birth. I had just had a phone call in the morning and that was all the preparation I had!! (other than the previous 9 months hehehe)

When you naturally go into labour I believe God created it to be a slow (ish) long (ish) process so that you can mentally prepare for what is about to happen, but once medicine intervenes and you're straight into labour, there is not prep you can do...you just have to go with it. I'm all for natural births (and I didn't REALLY want an epidural) but I just didn't feel like I could do this on my own. I was bound by fear.

So, while in labour (my body pretending to be anyway) I kept telling the midwife that I really needed that epidural NOW. She kept telling me that she couldn't give it to me because I wasn't in established labour, and that until I was 4cm dilated I couldn't have it. I kept telling her that it must be illegal to put someone into this kind of pain and not give them pain relief. That I couldn't do it. I had a breakdown really. I cried and she was really really good with me. I kept telling her that I wouldn't forget and every time she walked into the room I told her that I NEEDED that epidural. She would laugh with Russ (when I wasn't looking so I was told later) and Russell was really supportive and comforting.

At 6.15pm she came in to check if I had dilated at all and discovered that I hadn't. She had spoken to my OB about stopping the labour and re-starting a little later but the OB had said no. I was devastated. I didn't want to have to re-start, but this was just getting silly with no dilation!
I had been having 1min long contractions with 1min breaks in between for the last 3 or 4 hours and was at my wits end. Around 6.15pm they started to hit me with 2 consecutive contractions for 1min each (no breaks in between) and then a minute break. So, 2 contractions, 1 break...not a good ratio if you ask me!! The midwife had other patients to check on and had left the room. She didn't think bub would be born till the next morning. She offered to give me a shot of pethadine and a shot of something else that started with 'M'...she said the pethadine would help relax and calm me, and the 'M' shot would make me sleepy and hopefully help me get some sleep. So I agreed and had the shots.

So, the midwife was out of the room and I had Russell sitting next to me reading his magazines. I instantly felt woozy and sleepy. I would ask Russell a question and instantly forget if I had asked it or if I had just imagined asking him, so I would ask him another three times! He had called family to tell them that things would probably not happen till the next morning...my parents were getting ready to head down to dad's big 50th birthday party.

After a while, probably around 6.45pm I felt my waters break and I shuddered. I muttered to Russell that my waters had broken and he nodded and kept reading...thinking that it would still be quite a while off. After about 5mins I started to feel the urge to push. I told Russell that I was pushing, and I swear I have never seen him shoot up and out of a chair so fast! He ran off to find a midwife and left me pushing away on my own!! I was told later that he had trouble finding someone because one of the nurses had gone on dinner break and there was only the one midwife around and she was with consulting with someone else. They both ran back into the room where I was still pushing away, the midwife saying "what are you doing?" "oh my goodness oh my goodness!". Another push and my little girl was born...7.06pm. The midwife had yelled into the hallway for someone else to come help and they honestly only just made it in time. I was saying over and over again "my baby, my Ava, my baby" I just held her and was completely in love. Because I had only just had the shots I was still as drowsy as ever and was having so much trouble keeping my eyes open I just wanted to sleep!!

So I cuddled Ava and every now and then would close my eyes for a little sleep :)

Sure enough she was born just in time for Dad’s party which started at 7pm! I missed going to Dad’s party and celebrating with him, but I will at least get to celebrate his 51st with him!! I now have my first daughter born on her great-great-grandfathers 100th birthday, and my second daughter born on her grandfathers 50th birthday!! Which is pretty special.

While the birth of Ava didn’t really go to plan (the plan was originally a water birth in my own time) she still arrived in her (and God’s) timing and she is still healthy and beautiful. I am so blessed to have experienced child birth twice now! They have been the BEST experiences of my life! Though labour and child birth is pretty hard and mentally tough, it is something so special, it’s hard to describe.

I love BOTH my daughters. My gems….the cherries on top of my sundaes (the best part!). They are such blessings and I am so blessed to have both of them.

Xxx I love you my specious and bloss xxx