open forum not so open

Now I dont mean that in a bad way. I mean in it by way of I was under the impression that we were there to talk about whatever was brought up by anyone.
We had Barry Austin facilitate the meeting, just to have someone outside the church and who could control any outbursts or what have you. He did a really good job.
He started the meeting by telling us why the meeting had been called (russ and i looked at each other confused and a few people didnt realise that there was a particular issue that had caused the meeting. We understood that it was to generate communication)
I wont go into all the details of the issue because i dont have a whole heap of time or space to write. But put simply. Our pastor would like his wife to be his co-pastor. She has been studying at Bible College and she actually started at Bible College before our Pastor did, and she is fully qualified and they would both like to be recognised for the work they both put into the church. The way that this was put to the congregation has upset many people. People were wanting to know why they hadnt know about this previously when our Pastor renewed his contract in 2005/may have been 06? Why the eldership had known and had been praying about it for a while and didnt tell the congregation? Etc Etc.
All I could keep thinking was this: We are stuck in a small church mentality. I dont really want to know the ins and outs of every little decision that gets made for the church. I trust my elders and pastor enough in the decision making process.
When this proposition got put to the church we were given a few weeks to pray about it. However people started mumbling (of course) and talking behind peoples back. Now we have alot of very hurt people including our pastors wife and our pastor, and a few elders. Alot of things came out at the meeting that I was very surprised at, but I wouldnt post here as it involves peoples hurts and i dont feel comfortable posting them all over the net.
As I metioned before about what I was thinking, (small church mentality where pretty much the congregation decides on everything) I was waiting for a space to say it, one of our elders who stepped down a couple of months ago brought it up. He put it in a way that I never could have put. He said that we are no longer at the size where the congregation should decide everything and that he would love to see this church trust their leadership team. I am still a little confused, as to how some people who have been in this church for 10 - 20 years dont trust the leadership of the church . I have been there for about 18mths and I trust them, if I really have an issue with something, I would approach them about it. Its been hard leaving a church where being a member of the congregation you are told whats happening and encouraged to pray, but the decision isnt made by me/congregation to now go to a church where every single tiny thing gets put to the congregation, including whether we let someone head up a new ministry! It drives me insane! (im all for you Greg!)
Which I may have to do. Regarding the issue of considering his wife as a pastor doesnt seem right to me. I dont believe that women should pastor churches - whether she is co-pastoring with her husband or not. Im sure you'll all beat me up about it, but I dont care. Call me a traditionalist, I dont care. I dont see the reasoning for it and I cant find any Scripture that encourages it. (sorry if im wording it all wrong)
I fully agree that his wife needs to be recognised for what she does, and the part she plays, but I dont agree with making her a pastor.
Anyway, thats a little info to let you all know how the meeting went.
Russell didnt want me to go because it may not help me in the state im in with this church, but I went anyway promising that I wouldnt say a word, pull a face (just joking) or anything! And I did, I just sat there and listened. I had nothing to be worried about.